My Window

I am so distraught. The window on this path has been getting splashed upon every time I think I've cleaned it off. I filled with the fear of abandonment. It feels like I have peeking at my life through a window dirtied my abandonment issues. I am looking for my Windex now.

'For a woman, coming off fear is like an addict coming off drugs.' Vivian Gornick

Men!

On this Path of the Emperor, I am seeing my husband in a different light. Last week, I had a sympathetic, empathetic insight into how my husband thinks. I saw the 'cavemen' needing to provide for his woman. It was heartfelt. Well, the worm iside of my head has turned. Now I want men to be more like women!

'In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life. It goes on.' Robert Frost

The Path of the Emperor

As Emperor on my throne - all that I see - is my kingdom. And that is exactly the point of this Path for me. All that I can see - is all the ways that I can see it. It is only the way I can see it. I am so stopping now and seeing if I can think of the situation I am in in a different way.

'The most successful people are those who are good at plan B.' James Yorke

Fears and Belief Systems

I am finding a level of insight into the fears that form my belief systems. Or is it my belief systems creating and supporting my fears. I know confusion for me is a good thing. It means that I am ready for change - ready to step outside of my comfort zone.

'Any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts.' Arnold Bennett

The Emperor Has New Clothes

I couldn't resist the blog title now that I am on the Path of the Emperor. Before officially being on the Path of the Emperor, I had started seeing my husband with different eyes. I could sense the male 'caretaker/provider' in him. Surprisingly, this did not trigger the 'caretaker/nurturer' in me. I felt taken care of, perhaps, for the first time ever. Maybe because I felt more present in our relationship. I felt safe. The benevolence of the Emperor was coming through my husband.

'Life is like a ten-speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.' Charles Schulz

A Pattern I found in Yesod

I am diligently working on releasing the pattern of 'not following up.' I am an idea person. I have all these great ideas...and I just want someone else to materialize them for me. I believe it has to do with risking...and the responsibility of what can happen after the idea is materialized.

'How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.' Annie Dillard

Abundance is Where You Look

I am experiencing a quiet acknowledging of the Empress working, or rather, being in my life. I am seeing any disruptions in my life as part of a larger piece of the puzzle. I seem to be able to detach from things that used to stress me. I truly feel richly blessed.

'Great talent finds happiness in execution.' Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Yesod and Patterns

I am sheepishly looking at my patterns. I must be growing because I am looking closer at the patterns of my life. I can see where I have been choosing survival modes of behavior instead of being in a place of gratitude. I am experiencing more pauses in my life...in order to make better choices of what I want to bring into Malkuth.

'Life is the sum of all your choices.' Albert Camus

Empress and Creativity

I feel so pregnant in my ideas and my actions. The Empress in all her abundance is helping me harvest her potential. When I create, I am abundant. My expressions of action and emotion, when I touch in to the gifts of the Empress, come from a greater sense of my Higher Self. My thinking goes from 'me' to 'us.'

'It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.' C. S. Lewis

Yesod and My Potential

I have had trouble with my blog...and so much has happened. I am speaking on the Tarot at Borders in Oak Park, Il. This has been a re-awakening into what the Tarot has done for me and how the Tarot are pictographs of the Tree of Life. This is one of the opportunities afforded me by Yesod. I feel like my Tree of Life work is changing my brain patterns - for the good. My courage is growing - my risk-taking is taking a new turn.
'Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.' John Lennon

Daleth and Doors Opening

I am pleased to announce that I will be appearing at Borders Books in Oak Park, IL on Sunday, Jan 9 from 2-4. I see that this is another door that has opened for me during my pathwork on Daleth. I have been seeing opportunities and seizing them - not quite heedlessly - but with the attitude that I don't know where this will take me. The Empress and I will be sitting on our thrones receiving....
'Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome.' Arthur Ashe

Mirrors of Yesod

I have been examining my patterns through the mirrors of Yesod. It is the new year and I have been tempted to make resolutions. I am resisting and have started declaring that my patterns are changing. I am not addressing my habits. That has been an old way of thinking for me. It's interesting to note that by looking at the smaller picture of me in the Yesod mirrors I am able to see the bigger picture of my life.
'It is more important to know where you are going than to get there quickly. Do not mistake activity for achievement.' Mabel Newcomber